“He’s Just Not That Into You…”

“Harsh words from the best-selling dating coaching book may set single women quarterback-less coaches free.”

Why won’t he call me? Why won’t he play for me?
Why doesn’t he want to go out with me? Why won’t he be my quarterback?
Why doesn’t he like me? (Well, that one is still applicable!)

(Yes, Jay Cutler has his very own 'Bat Phone!' That line goes directly to Jay Cutler.)

Why won’t Jay Cutler call you or play for you, McDaniels? Why doesn’t he want to stay in Denver with you as the head coach?

Well, maybe it is because you openly offered him up for trade, in hopes of obtaining Matt Cassel. (Jay Cutler doesn’t want the sloppy seconds of a desperate man!)

Maybe it is because he was promised that the coaching staff would remain the same even though the Broncos made the ridiculous choice to fire Shanahan and now he doesn’t even know anyone’s name! (You are a liar and a cheat, McDaniels!)

Maybe Jay Cutler is just tired of the Denver weather! (Jay Cutler has feelings too…cold!)

OR…


Maybe, He’s just not that into you!

Yeah, that's the book/movie that tells women (or in this case, coach) that if a man (QB) isn’t calling, you should stop making excuses because, in it’s title’s harsh words, chances are “He’s Just Not that Into You.”

What that book neglects to do is tell men (QBs), that before they get so cocky and think that women/coaches are waiting for their phone calls, they should probably consider that there are other men/players on the market and they just may not be the best one. Perhaps I should write a reply book called “Maybe You are Just too Into Yourself (Jay Cutler)!”: There are a million, nope, billion men out there and you are probably a heck of a lot luckier than you think! So take a look around before you start thinking someone is waiting for your call.

Yup, I mean you, Jay Cutler. You know I love you, but perhaps you should consider a few things.

Maybe, you really aren’t “all that!”: Since you have been on the team (for the third straight season) the Broncos have not made the playoffs! (Okay, maybe we can blame Plummer for some of that)

Maybe, there are better men out there: Georgia quarterback Matthew Stafford had an excellent performance at his pro day and the Detroit Lions need picks! Which means, you might end up in Detroit! (Still cold, still sucks…only worse!)

Maybe, you are not that great of a catch (or pass): Your passer rating was an average of 85.

Maybe, you should appreciate how lucky you really are: I am not sure if that is worse then ending up in a trade for a some problem player and Brady “Nobody Picked Me” Quinn with the Browns. Cleveland…seriously?

Maybe, you are unreliable: Worse, you lost me 210K in my elimination pool when you lost to the KC CHIEFS and the OAKLAND RAIDERS!



Yeah, I still like you, (notice at the beginning of the post, I loved you), but I am a very loyal and understanding girl! What are you really worth, Jay Cutler?

But don't worry, I have no idea how they get your QB back rating, either...no one does! I am pretty sure it means...absolutely nothing!

Seriously though, stop crying because it is NOT cute! You don't wanna end up this season's Brett Favre!

PS. You can’t just leave Denver, what the **** (I’m not moving to Detroit!)