I didn’t get to watch the draft due to a minor wedding crisis, but to be honest, my impatience trumps my love for football when it comes to sitting for 2 days and 256 draft picks…after a few rounds, it feels like sitting through baseball season.
So after the first round, maybe the second, I am on to other weekend activities and reading the occasional scrolling ticker at the bottom of the screen.
We always know who the first pick is going to be, long before the draft starts (unless there is an Eli Manning switch-a-roo!) and usually, I make it back to the TV on day 2 of the NFL draft for pick number 256, otherwise known as “Mr. Irrelevant.” So I am only covering the first and last picks of the 2009 NFL Draft.
Who is Mr. Irrelevant?
‘Mr. Irrelevant’ is the tongue in cheek name given to the very last pick of the draft by Paul Salata (He was a wide receiver for the Baltimore Colts, like a million years ago) in 1976. He dubbed these final draftees ‘Mr. Irrelevant’ because they are often said to be the most irrelevant players on the field. After all, 256 players were picked before them.
By the time you get to the 256th pick, there can’t be much strategy left. No one is going to make a big trade and all of the star athletes waiting to be drafted in the Radio City Music Hall, are long gone…yes, even Brady Quinn!
Most NFL fans say that once it gets down to the final few picks in the draft, it's better for a player not to get selected, so they can sign a free-agent contract with a team they choose. (Yeah, because it is that easy.) However, very few college football players are sitting by their phones on Day 2 of the draft saying “I hope my phone doesn’t ring and I don’t get drafted.”
In fact, even while the clock counted down the 3-minuets it took to select this years ‘Mr. Irrelevant,’ hundreds of guys were sitting around their TVs waiting to hear their name get called by Paul Salata, in hopes of receiving the Kansas City colored jersey with 256 on the back…and an NFL contract.
This years, Mr. Irrelevant is South Carolina Gamecock, kicker, Ryan Succop. Everyone in Radio City seemed a little disappointed (and by a little, I mean the place filled with boo’s and hisses), when KC picked the kicker, but those people might be interested to know, in the NFL 56 games were decided by a field goal or less.
And if you still don’t think the Kicker is important, ask Ray Finkle…
Or the REAL RAY FINKLE, Scott ‘Wide Right’ Norwood. (I may have added that ‘wide right’ part!)
Anyway, I can’t name any other Mr. Irrelevant without Google, but since Paul Salata, named the last pick in the draft, the worst seat in the house has become the second to last pick in the draft. Mr. Irrelevant is anything but ‘irrelevant.’ (at least for one week!)
This year Ryan Succop, not only gets the famous #256 jersey, but an entire week devoted to him. Mr. Irrelevant week is an entire week of events in Newport, California dedicated to the player picked last in the NFL Draft. According to irrelevantweek.com, this year he gets…
Arrival Party
Press Conference
Shower of Gifts
All-Star Lowsman Banquet (where he will be presented with the Lowsman Award, as opposed to the Heisman)
Tour of Surf City
Irrelevant Rams Cheerleader Contest
Main Street Welcome and Parade
And Closing Ceremonies.
Seems like a pretty good deal, until you see what the FIRST PLAYER DRAFTED GETS:
First pick in the draft was UGA’s Matt Stafford, who received a measly $72 million dollar contract worth $78 if he meets all his incentives (for Detroit, what could incentives possibly be? Double the number of wins they had last year? They can’t possible expects the super bowl…or even playoffs).
Is Mr. Stafford worth 72 millions? Probably not. He is only one kid and let’s face it…the Lions need miracles.
SIDE NOTE: Although, he isn’t just one kid when teamed up with the Detroit’s 82nd pick in the draft; the “Jesus Shuttlesworth” of football (as he was dubbed by LaVar Arrington), 2005 All-Big Ten Freshman Team, 2007 Outback Bowl champion, 2008 First-Team All-Big Ten Team, wide receiver, punt return specialist and the occasional quarterback, the Nittany Lions’ ‘Mr. Versatility,’ Penn State football player, Derrick ‘the Lion Hearted’ Williams (but I may be slightly biased).
While, Mr. Irrelevant will be famous for a week, Matt Stafford’s 72 million is likely to make him AND HIS GIRLFRIEND famous for a little longer.
I don’ t know, maybe hoisting kegs over your head in what appears to be a trailer park, is a Georgia thing? :P
Noooo, she wasn’t planning to use this picture later…when you got drafted. She just happens to be the only one smiling at the camera while you cuddle with your friend in the grass.
At least she is a cute girl…
Wait! That isn’t her? Is it? (Funny how these pictures surface when you are guaranteed to be $41.7 million richer). Is that Knowshon with you?
I am not surprised. Knowshon wasn’t worried about getting drafted…even during the draft.
Incase you were wondering, Moreno was picked 12th in the draft by the Denver Broncos and signed a six-year, $40.5 million contract. A little over 9.5 million a year. (But did he get a parade???)
If it is any consolation for being picked number 256 and not 1, Ryan Succop is pretty cute. Mr. Stafford on the other hand...well, at least has $41.7 million guaranteed, but he won't be making my fantasy draft any time soon.
NEW G-MEN:
With their first pick, the G-men took, North Carolina (who knew they had a football team, too) wide receiver, Hakeem Nicks to replace Plax, but Eli was hoping for a more seasoned receiver saying “After being here five years and seeing how rookies come in, it is a learning curve. It is a process. So we'll try to get them as much as they can and see what they can do and how they can help us next year."
Perhaps Eli was hoping for a trade including Braylon Edwards or Anquan Boldin, who were available for a second round draft pick. Honestly, I was too Eli…but the G-men decided to continue to stack their D, after picking up almost every available defensive player in the free agent pool, using their second pick to take yet another outside linebacker.
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