1. The ‘safety’ has to be the funnest signal in football. The quaterback gets backed up anywhere near the end zone and suddenly everyone in the stadium, including 300 something lbs linebackers are standing with their hands over their heads like genies. Some people signal first downs, other people see holding and grab their wrists, but everyone signals for a safety! It is so much fun!
2. I wonder if when a football player makes a huge play and points up to Jesus, he points back at them?
3. Are Omar Epps and Mike Tomlin twins? Do they know each other? Do their mom’s look alike? Have they ever run into each other and thought “Holy Sh*t! You look just like me!?”
4. Just when I thought that saying Palamalu was the coolest name in the Super Bowl, I discovered Coach Wizenhut
5. When Ben Patrick scored a touchdown for the Cards, he was the first 7th round choice to score a touchdown in a Super Bowl since 2005. Is that a significant statistic? Who comes up with those and how are they so readily available? Before the game do they hand the announcers a paper that says “In the event that Ben Patrick scores, say this…”
6. I am discriminating against certain touchdown celebrations. I don’t mind seeing a traditional chest bump or high five. Some guys do a celebration that looks like lunges and I don’t mind that either. Heck, if you just ran 50 yards and you aren’t tired, please, go ahead, do some lunges. I find it disturbing however, when a grown man who regularly smashes his body into 300lb men suddenly gets twinkle toes and ballerinas his flapping arms around the end zone. Then again, if I were to score an NFL touchdown, they wouldn’t have enough flags for the excessive celebrations I would draw. I would be dancing for hours, provided I could still breathe. They would have to carry me off the field.
7. If I had control over the telestrator, I would not be able to resist drawing mustaches on people and writing inappropriate speech bubbles.
8. Can you seriously not review the last play of the Superbowl to see if its a forward pass or fumble?
Either way, congrats Pittsburgh! I look forward to all the Steelers won the Super Bowl songs!!!
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