Bengal [ben-gawl, gahl]
-noun
1. a former province in NE India, now divided between India and Bangladesh.
2. word made up in Ohio, referring to a mediocre athlete wearing orange and black and based out of Cincinnati. (possibly an attempt to relate to the Bengal Tiger)
-pronoun
1. used interrogatively as a request for specific information: e.g. Bengals? (meaning: What the hell happened to the Steelers?)
Before Sunday, the last time the Bengal’s beat the Steelers, “Ocho Cinco” was still just Chad Johnson. This Sunday’s game looked a lot like last week for the Steelers. They dominated the ball, but didn’t deliver and a missed Steelers field goal (again) allowed them to be beat by three points (again). Even though, it may have seemed like déjà vu to the Steelers, this is the first time Big Ben has lost in Ohio, ever. I am not ready to believe in the Bengals, quite yet, but I do love a last second touchdown (unless my team is playing then I will take them winning in a blow out over the panic of a close game, any day). 20-23, Cincy.
Matt Stafford had a party an no one came, except Jim Zorn and the Skins. The Lions finally won a game, but there were only 40,000 fans in attendance. (It’s okay Matt. I’d come to your party! However, I wouldn’t come to see the Detroit Lions play football). We knew it couldn’t go on forever, but I really thought it was going to be the St Louis Rams who put an end to the Lions 20-game losing streak, but the Redskins beat them to the punch and boy, boy was Washington looking ready and willing to take the embarrassing title of the first team to lose Detroit. Jason Campbell continued to “drop the ball.” Seriously, I have never seen unassisted fumbles quite like those of Campbell. I am pretty sure that every starter on the Washington defense got injured. But the likely guest of honor at Matt Stafford’s “The Lions Finally Won” party, Jim Zorn. When Zorn made the call to “go for it” on 4th and 2, this is what fear looks like…
Fear, not only that they wouldn’t get the two yards (they didn’t), but for his job and most likely that of his terrible quarterback. 14-19, Detroit. (But the real loser here is anyone who bought season ticket to the Redskins!)
Like every other team, the Packers breezed through their game against the St. Louis Rams, who are now on a 13 game losing streak. Aaron Rodgers threw for 269 yards and two touchdowns and was only sacked twice (which actually is a good thing considering he was sacked 10 times in the first 2 games). I am glad Rodgers and his O-line made up this week, because if the Packers don’t win next week when they take on the Vikings and old Favre, there is no justice in this world. I wanna see the Pack win by at least this margin Monday Night. 36-17, Green Bay.
Speaking of Fav-ruh. The Vikings won the Super Bowl? Oh no wait, it was just Favre throwing a touchdown pass. I don’t get it. I know everything Brett does has to be dramatic, but quarterbacks throw touchdown passes every week. I don’t know if you know this, but it is actually what they get paid to do. So please, explain to me why there was more hugging and celebrating when the Vikings squeaked passed the SAN FRANCISCO 49ers, then at the Lions first victory in 20 games? Was this a big game? Even when he breaks records, I am not impressed. If you do something for a 100 years you’re bound to break a few records. I guess I should be impressed that a 40-year-old arm can throw a touchdown pass, but I am really tired of Brett Favre on my TV. 24-27, Favres.
As for Quarterbacks that are not quite what they used to be, I find Tom Brady to be inconsistent, at best. Sure, he threw his 200th touchdown pass on Sunday and he still better than most quarterbacks in the league, but he doesn’t look like a guy who can pull of a season of 18 wins (and most importantly, ONE LOSS). Unlike the 500 passes Brady usually averages per game, this week’s win over Atlanta was a running game. Randy Moss is getting up there and the Patriots aren’t scoring like they used to, but it was enough to give the Falcons their first loss of the season. 10-26, New England.
Better than Matt Cassel, though. Who was 14/18 for 90 yards on Sunday against the Eagles. The only Quarterback to produce less yards was Michael Vick, with a whopping 0 yards passing and 7 yards rushing. That’s right, after all the controversy stirred up by PETA’s new best friend and the Eagle’s ‘46th man’ roster problems, Vick was nothing more than a decoy, sent out to “distract the dogs” so other players could safely pass. Announcers referred to a “wildcat offense” but I am pretty sure the Eagles were just making it up as they went along. (I’d give them tame-kitten, at best). But if you are going to experiment with your offense, do it against the Chiefs. 14-34, Eagles.
Zero first downs for three quarters and 86 total offensive yards…who can pull something like that off? Who else? The Giant Defense! Tampa Bay had no passing yards until late in the 3rd and 20 yards rushing…then the G-men put in their second string. The Giants ground attack returned and Bradshaw and Jacobs each had a touchdown. No turnovers, 3 for 5 in the red…. Too bad the Bucs didn’t make it to the game. They could have learned a few things. 24-0, Giants.
When the Titans and the Jets took the field it was a clash of ugly jerseys and fumbles. The Titans in their Oilers throwbacks and the Jets in their old, yellow Titan uniforms, each had 2 fumbles. However, both of Tennessee’s fumbles were Ryan Mouton special teams fumbles, which the Jets converted into 14 points. The Titans are 0-3 for the first time since 1990 and this week the Titans beat themselves. 17-24, Jets.
Kurt Warner threw with an amazing 92% passing accuracy. There were no parades or fireworks, like there was for Favre’s one touchdown pass (and Warner is pretty old), but it could be because the Cardinals got spanked by the Colts. 31-10.
I heard a lot of questions about the reflectors running around on the field in Seattle, but I liked the Seahawks bright jerseys. It takes real guts to pull of fluorescent green. Nice job, guys! But while the Seahawks were strong in the fashion risk department, they didn’t bring that, “je ne sais quoi” to the field. Since when does Jay Cutler do things like, 21-of-27 passes for 247 yards with three touchdowns? I guess, Sunday. 25-19, Chicago.
The Saints trampled the Bills and T.O. didn’t have a single reception and I told you the time bomb was ticking. It had been too long since we heard from T.O. and I was beginning to think he was going to let Kanye West take his title as King of Stupid. After the game, sports commentator Rodney Harrison accused Owens of having a “me-first” mentality and putting his needs over his teams. Naturally, T.O. used his favorite medium to reply, Twitter. (Didn’t they ban this from the NFL?)
T.O. targeted Harrison's suspension for using “hormones” when he played in the NFL, calling him a "loser" and "cheater" and asking "Hey rodney! Send me sum steroids 2 the Bills facility next week!" 27-7, Saints.
Miami lost Chad Pennington for the entire season on Sunday against the Chargers; Henne and White, both rookies, on the bench, it is anybody’s team. With an 0-3 start, there is no place to go but up. 13-23, San Diego.
Last night, the Cowgirls played the Panthers and with both Romo and Delhomme’s future being questioned, the Dallas stadium looked like a huge, over-hyped pressure cooker. I was hoping to watch “Jerry’s World” fall apart, as two quarterbacks battled to prove themselves. Instead, I was bored out of my mind, which gave it plenty of time to wander…
Observation I made during the Cowgirls-Panther game:
1. When moms tell their kids, “don’t take candy from strangers” they especially mean, Jerry Jones. He is creepy! (and I am pretty sure that taking things from Jerry Jones is a lot like selling your soul).
2. Tony Romo didn’t get any better; the team he played is worse.
3. Jake Delhomme’s O-line, hates him!
4. Soon the Panthers Steve Smith will be known as “the other Steve Smith” and the NY Giant Steve Smith, will just be Steve Smith.
5. I am pretty sure that Tony Romo and Jason Whitten are “more than friends.”
6. The saying “everything is bigger in Texas” should be followed by the cliché “bigger isn’t always better.”
7. How does Tony Romo change so fast after the game? Was he wearing that ugly flannel under his jersey?
8. People continue to talk about Dallas like they are a great football team, yet they haven’t won a Super Bowl or a single play-off game this decade.
9. The Cowboy’s pants don’t match their shirts. (hey, it was a boring first half)
10. The Panthers know one play: deep to Steve Smith, even if he is covered.
7-21, Dallas.
PS.
Baltimore over Cleveland, 3-34.
Jacksonville over Houston, 31-24.
